ARGENTINA: How People Act in Public

Like most nationalities (except we odd Americans), the Argentinians are not very "smiley" when they are out in public. Instead, they move through the public world with pretty neutral expressions on their faces - neither noticeably happy nor unhappy.

However, this lack of visible joy doesn't equate to a lack of concern for their fellow man. Argentinians are remarkably solicitious of each other in public - a fact that I've heard foreigners of all nationalities remark on. People unfailing give up their seat on the subway to pregnant women and the disabled. Taxi drivers and small shop owners will routinely round down your bill so you don't have to deal with small change, and wave you off with "don't worry about it." Last week, I dropped some papers while I was waiting for the subway. They were right at my feet - I could easily have picked them up - but two strangers gathered them up and returned them to me before I even had a chance to bend down. I gave a big smile of thanks and got the hint of a grin in return...Again, not real smiley, but very kind.

Another striking feature of public life is the extent to which public discourse occurs through unspoken language. The best way to illustrate this is to start with the tango. In a milonga or tango-hall, a man traditionally asks a woman to dance by locking eyes with her across the room. A moment passes, and then one of them stands up and approaches the other person to wordlessly accept the invitation. This sounds horribly corny until you experience it, and then it's actually nice. The custom does pose certain risks, though: I spent one afternoon stumbling around the dance floor with very experienced tango dancers after I continued to inadvertently accept their offers to dance.

This custom of non-verbal communication still persists in modern times & I've experienced it myself. One day, I was sitting on a crowded subway car in the seat intended for the disabled or the pregnant. I felt guilt-free - everyone around me was fully 'abled' and did not need my seat - until across the car, I suddenly noticed a pregnant woman standing near the door. I felt bad that I was taking the seat she rightfully deserved, so I was probably looking at her pretty intently when, across that crowded subway car, she made clear eye contact with me, smiled, and shook her head 'no thanks' in a friendly way. Wow, so that's how they do it! I felt like a real Argentinian.